Comments on: Generation Y doesn’t need a reference http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/ Kontrary provides a different take on tech, media and life by Rebecca Thorman. Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:58:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Rebecca Thorman http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6925 Rebecca Thorman Tue, 13 Dec 2011 23:09:00 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6925 This is one of the stranger comments I've ever received. Oh well. This was posted two years ago. I still stand by it. Network? Hell yes. References? Eh. This is one of the stranger comments I’ve ever received. Oh well. This was posted two years ago. I still stand by it. Network? Hell yes. References? Eh.

]]> By: Rebecca Thorman http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6924 Rebecca Thorman Tue, 13 Dec 2011 23:02:00 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6924 Possibly true. Privilege has given me a lot; I recognize that. Possibly true. Privilege has given me a lot; I recognize that.

]]> By: Rebecca Thorman http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6923 Rebecca Thorman Tue, 13 Dec 2011 22:59:00 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6923 You're right... those paychecks I've been getting have fallen off trees! Thanks so much for clearing that up. You’re right… those paychecks I’ve been getting have fallen off trees! Thanks so much for clearing that up.

]]> By: John http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6922 John Tue, 13 Dec 2011 22:52:00 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6922 Im gonna say a cool company would be "McDonalds" and a cool job would be "Drive Through Order Taker". Cause thats about the extent that this little gem of info is going to get you.  This person has obviously not taken any career "to the next level", cause rest assured, any credible company is going to want references. In fact as a rule of thumb, I wouldn't really listen to the advice of someone fresh out of college.  I want a video from Rebecca Thorman 10 years from now to see how she feels about references.  She will either stick to her guns and hold on to that minimum wage job at her local fast food joint, or she'll have realized that most of the things her parents told her were true. Im gonna say a cool company would be “McDonalds” and a cool job would be “Drive Through Order Taker”. Cause thats about the extent that this little gem of info is going to get you.  This person has obviously not taken any career “to the next level”, cause rest assured, any credible company is going to want references.

In fact as a rule of thumb, I wouldn’t really listen to the advice of someone fresh out of college.  I want a video from Rebecca Thorman 10 years from now to see how she feels about references.  She will either stick to her guns and hold on to that minimum wage job at her local fast food joint, or she’ll have realized that most of the things her parents told her were true.

]]> By: John http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6921 John Tue, 13 Dec 2011 22:39:00 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-6921 Im gonna go out on a limb here and say you've never held a professional job ever. Im gonna go out on a limb here and say you’ve never held a professional job ever.

]]> By: Joey Little Cloud http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4103 Joey Little Cloud Fri, 21 Jan 2011 01:31:38 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4103 Great advice, as long as you're a pretty young white girl. Great advice, as long as you’re a pretty young white girl.

]]> By: Angela http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4102 Angela Mon, 22 Mar 2010 00:03:44 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4102 I think that your statements are a little hypocritical and just poor business sense - especially given that you said you got your leadership job at a company through your contacts - who essentially acted as your references. Not burning bridges is not "old school advice." References don't need to be just employment references, they can be character references as well. Think of your references as an extension of your network...which is what they should be. While I agree that we can't be people pleasers, I still think it's important to have a wide network of people that will stand behind you. Imagine you burned every bridge, no one would help you and your network would be really small. And with no network you have no opportunities. I think that your statements are a little hypocritical and just poor business sense – especially given that you said you got your leadership job at a company through your contacts – who essentially acted as your references. Not burning bridges is not “old school advice.” References don’t need to be just employment references, they can be character references as well. Think of your references as an extension of your network…which is what they should be.

While I agree that we can’t be people pleasers, I still think it’s important to have a wide network of people that will stand behind you. Imagine you burned every bridge, no one would help you and your network would be really small. And with no network you have no opportunities.

]]> By: pmaina http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4101 pmaina Thu, 21 Jan 2010 22:05:58 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4101 Grace, I second that. Couldnt have "said" it better myself! References nowadays are about brown nosing - how does the prospective employer ascertain objectivity? Historically, great men never had good references because they always rocked the boat: - John the baptist: Hated by a queen - Jesus: Hated by a King & an entire community - Moses: Hated by a King - King David: Hated by a King - Daniel: Jailed by a King - Galileo Galilei: Disgraced for asserting that the world was not FLAT What kind of references would the above people have? Yet they are some of the greatest people who ever lived. What makes HR people think the former boss gicving reference is professional, ethical and has good intentions? That the former boss was not a sick sadist/ psychopath (30% probability according to researchers!)? In some places it's no longer about your work and what you did for your company. Its about how well you sucked up to an abusive abusive boss who used the threat of "ruining future prospects" to keep their victims on a leash. Dont burn bridges = Be nice to the sick jerk - even when you dont have to! After being bullied and abused at work a couple of times I made up my mind. NO MORE. I will fight back and when forced to a desperate position, I will cross the bridge, then burn it. Close the chapter permanently. I can survive without a "reference" from a sadistic jerk who will probably defame me at the slightest chance anyway. Seriously, what guarantee do you have that an EVIL person who was nasty to you WHEN YOU WERE THERE PHYSICALLY will suddenly have a touch of benevolence, goodwill and sense of fairness when they see one last opportunity to attack you? If your boss is a jerk and mistreats you - get something better then let him/her know in no uncertain terms what EXACTLY you think of him/her when you're leaving (or immediately after leaving - in case its not safe). You dont need that kind of poison in your life. After 10+ years in corporate world, I made a decision to take control of my life and have never been happier and more healthy. If your boss is ajerk, dont hesitate to burn that bridge. Call a spade a spade and make that one-way move to a better you. Cheers! :-) Grace, I second that. Couldnt have “said” it better myself! References nowadays are about brown nosing – how does the prospective employer ascertain objectivity?

Historically, great men never had good references because they always rocked the boat:

- John the baptist: Hated by a queen
- Jesus: Hated by a King & an entire community
- Moses: Hated by a King
- King David: Hated by a King
- Daniel: Jailed by a King
- Galileo Galilei: Disgraced for asserting that the world was not FLAT

What kind of references would the above people have? Yet they are some of the greatest people who ever lived.

What makes HR people think the former boss gicving reference is professional, ethical and has good intentions? That the former boss was not a sick sadist/ psychopath (30% probability according to researchers!)?

In some places it’s no longer about your work and what you did for your company. Its about how well you sucked up to an abusive abusive boss who used the threat of “ruining future prospects” to keep their victims on a leash.

Dont burn bridges = Be nice to the sick jerk – even when you dont have to!

After being bullied and abused at work a couple of times I made up my mind. NO MORE. I will fight back and when forced to a desperate position, I will cross the bridge, then burn it. Close the chapter permanently.

I can survive without a “reference” from a sadistic jerk who will probably defame me at the slightest chance anyway.

Seriously, what guarantee do you have that an EVIL person who was nasty to you WHEN YOU WERE THERE PHYSICALLY will suddenly have a touch of benevolence, goodwill and sense of fairness when they see one last opportunity to attack you?

If your boss is a jerk and mistreats you – get something better then let him/her know in no uncertain terms what EXACTLY you think of him/her when you’re leaving (or immediately after leaving – in case its not safe).

You dont need that kind of poison in your life. After 10+ years in corporate world, I made a decision to take control of my life and have never been happier and more healthy. If your boss is ajerk, dont hesitate to burn that bridge. Call a spade a spade and make that one-way move to a better you.

Cheers!

:-)

]]> By: How to start a video blog – the definitive guide on video blogging | Modite http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4100 How to start a video blog – the definitive guide on video blogging | Modite Fri, 09 Oct 2009 21:18:31 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4100 [...] readers. Present a quick problem and ask your readers for input on the solution. Or use video to respond to comments in a more personal [...] [...] readers. Present a quick problem and ask your readers for input on the solution. Or use video to respond to comments in a more personal [...]

]]> By: Grace http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4099 Grace Sat, 03 Oct 2009 15:06:30 +0000 http://kontrary.com/2009/04/08/generation-y-doesnt-need-a-reference/#comment-4099 references are a complete waste and a joke. tainted, biased, colored, jealousy galore. the aging boomers work addicted enjoy doing this pseudo-vetting. people leave jobs all the time b/c the job sucks, abuse, verbal/.physical etc....that is why people leave jobs. effective interviewing, multiple interviews, results is what matters. not the typical corporate american references by former bosses that have an ax to grind, or are jealous/resentful that they are cowards and still have not left their sheeple type job. references are a complete waste and a joke. tainted, biased, colored, jealousy galore. the aging boomers work addicted enjoy doing this pseudo-vetting. people leave jobs all the time b/c the job sucks, abuse, verbal/.physical etc….that is why people leave jobs. effective interviewing, multiple interviews, results is what matters. not the typical corporate american references by former bosses that have an ax to grind, or are jealous/resentful that they are cowards and still have not left their sheeple type job.

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