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Generation Y is too quiet, too conservative

I was sitting in a classroom. The walls were covered in plaster and moldings, but behind all that was red brick, so red that the color seeped through the cracks of the old windows, and the sun, and the light, and the energy filled the almost summer air.

It was a time when I was – more or less – happy, and we were seated, twenty or twenty-five of us. Our desks outlined a jagged circle, and I was trying not to check out the young man three desks to the right, because I was still dating my first real boyfriend, trying to make it work from four hours away.

We sat and spoke of our beliefs, the environment, of possibilities. It was the discussion I had come to college for. One that I had looked forward to since the movie Dead Poet’s Society. One that I thought I would have again and again when I moved into my own apartment someday, with paint on the floor and ink stained on my fingers, groups of friends visiting at all hours. Rules would be broken, the establishment dismantled, dreams fulfilled.

But soon, too soon, the imagination of the discussion in that classroom petered out like a mandatory orgasm. And we didn’t stay long after either, filing out of the room like an Orwellian army.

No yelling, no protest, no change. Not even the slightest smell of melodrama lingered in the air.

That was the day that I learned we weren’t like other generations. And it wasn’t all gravy.

Thomas Friedman calls this phenomenon – our generation – quiet. Too quiet, in fact. Penelope Trunk calls us conservative. Not like politically conservative, but lifestyle conservative. As in none of us, except me I guess, are found in dark corners balling our eyes out. Generation Y is balanced like vanilla. Idealism with a cherry on top.

You know, that’s not all bad either, contrary to my sarcasm-infused tone. We’re vanilla vocally because we mainly agree on things. It’s not like the Vietnam war, or women getting the vote, or abolishing slavery where there were clear sides, right or wrong, multiple or few . You know, like, opinions – impassioned and defining.

We don’t really have opinions much anymore. We have beliefs. Opinions are contested. Beliefs are “the acceptance of and conviction in the truth, actuality, or validity of something,” and offensive to question.

These beliefs include that global warming is a problem. The Iraq war sucks. We should all be treated equal. We’re nodding our heads in unison like bobble heads lined up on a bookshelf. Smiling bobble heads, of course. We can’t forget about our idealism.

We are a teamwork generation, fully in line with each other. This, again, is a good thing. Top-down management will not survive the knowledge economy. And so, teamwork, and thus, Generation Y, is inherently conservative precisely because there is consensus, Trunk argues.

But when you seek only consensus and you don’t strongly encourage- nay, require – opinions to be voiced, challenged, turned upside down and explored like a mother searches for lice on her child’s head, then you aren’t coming to a rousing, exciting, and motivating consensus.

Generation Y is so overly focused on the yin of consensus that we’ve lost its yang of conflict. Like Seinfeld’s black and white cookie, the idea of yin and yang in Chinese philosophy is that positive and negative forces act together in order create energy. They are in constant battle, each trying to gain dominance, and if one succeeds in doing so then we are left without balance.

So, without conflict, consensus is a less than thrilling one-night stand.

Nowhere is this as painfully obvious as it is in social media, where we think we’re making a difference by adding the “Causes” application to Facebook, commenting on blogs in such a way as to not offend, where mediocrity reigns supreme, and we insist on engaging in a large amount of narcissistic navel-gazing every Monday morning.

“Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy didn’t change the world by asking people to join their Facebook crusades or to download their platforms… Virtual politics is just that – virtual,” Friedman states.

Ah, when will we learn? Conflict is good, fabulous even! Patrick Lencioni builds an entire fable around this exact idea in his popular book Death by Meeting. He discusses why most meetings suck, the main crux of his theory being that there is no conflict, no drama. No one voices their opinions loud enough in order to be hypothesized, tested, revised.

Think about decisions by committee (read: team). It’s a long, drawn out, excruciating process. The resulting consensus is often a watered-down version of what could have been.

This is the status of Generation Y – a watered-down version of what we could be.

We’re all about the team, but don’t exactly know how to use that effectively, preferring to be quiet, conservative, coloring inside the lines. Meaning, we play by the rules to create change and aren’t aware of what those rules are. Meaning we’re perfectly content not to push boundaries or ourselves.

There is good reason for this. “There is a strong, strong millennial dislike of ambiguity and risk,” Andrea Hershatter says. If the directions aren’t clear, we’re not going on any road trips.

This hesitancy creates a lack of urgency. Change is necessary, but there are no sands through the hourglass urging us that these are the days of our lives. No, we believe our children will deal with it, or someone will deal with it, somewhere, and we’ll just try not to make it worse, and probably – hopefully – make it better. We hope.

Hope. Guffaw.

Screw hope. Where’s the outrage?

If Generation Y is “not spitting mad, well, then they’re just not paying attention,” Friedman argues. “That’s what twentysomethings are for — to light a fire under the country.”

To light a fire, you have to have conflict, and to have conflict, you have to have an opinion.

That’s a good place to start for now. Stop being so nice.

Respect other viewpoints enough to challenge them.

Respect other ideas enough to disagree.

Moon the entire left side of the highway from your car window with your opinion on your backside. Put it out there for all to see.

Look to the cookie.

By Rebecca Healy

My goal is to help you find meaningful work, enjoy the heck out of it, and earn more money.

84 replies on “Generation Y is too quiet, too conservative”

This may just be me making your point but I’m certain an opinion is a type of belief. Iraq sucking is definitely still an opinion: it is your belief that it sucks. People have challenged that opinion for a few years now.

Don’t confuse opinions with pandering and argument seeking (a la Trunk). ;)

Kind of, Devin. The post that I linked under”We don’t really have opinions” explains the idea of opinion and belief well I think, over at Twenty Set by Monica. She says “A belief is acceptance of truth, while an opinion is judgment of truth.” So in that way, you’re right, they’re in the same ballpark, but not on the same team. I.e., I do believe there is a distinction.

Also, I chose to say the Iraq war sucks, because that is a widely held “belief” across all parties at this point. Of course not every single person agrees, but most people have accepted this idea as fact and are no longer challenging it… Thanks for making me think harder!

This is a great post Rebecca, I’m glad you found something you’re passionate about (I know you’ve been struggling for inspiration).

I’m afraid Gen Y suffers from apathy. Life is generally easy, you’ve yet to be truly challenged. We all hate the war, but since no one is being drafted, it’s too easy to hate it, but not do much more.

Gen Y needs to find it’s voice, it’s cause and then get on board and fight for it, really fight for it. It’s more than blogging or chatting online.

If you believe the so called experts we may very well be headed for a serious recession. The housing market is in shambles, which will make it difficult for many in Gen Y to buy a home. Maybe this will be the cause that unites…maybe not.

Gen Y will find something worth fighting for, you’re too smart not to.

Fantastic writing (esp. the Orwell reference, a personal favorite author). Often times, I find myself craving conflict. I look for it in the music I listen to, my desire to seek out people with different beliefs and argue, and numerous other ways. Watch Fight Club again, and you’ll see where this has been happening for some time. As a generation (and a society, even), we just don’t seem to care. Look at all the products we buy…all geared towards self absorption.

Could this generation of consensus be created by the increased number of people with access to college, in which, for the most part promotes a single perspective of secular progressivism?

Toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe. It is my opinion that there are very many ‘truths’ to be held.. so saying I accept one is no more to me than saying I have passed a judgment.

As a wise man once said “Wisdom is what’s left after we’ve run out of personal opinions”. Your personal opinion is that we are too quiet and conservative. You even offer that what we’re doing with social media is hardly acting–but where do we offer the other half of the story?

Does anyone have any better ideas? Have you or I done anything better than coming up with ‘Causes’ (the application that has raised hundreds and thousands of dollars with minimal effort). Nay, we simply express our opinions on the matters and wait for someone else to act. ;)

@ Scott – I think apathy is a fairly accurate description in some cases… and it’s a word I’ve long used in my mind. But it’s not the exact right word. I’ll let you know when I discover what the right word is.

Anyway, I disagree that we haven’t been challenged. Er, yes, we haven’t been challenged in a way that affects on a personal deep level, but this is partly because society had coddled us into not caring on that personal deep level… hm…

@ Norcorss – thanks! I find myself craving conflict as well as should be obvious to anyone that reads this blog… and since I have good community of people who do read, I can’t imagine that we’re all not craving conflict more than we’d like to admit..

@ BrandonA – Great, thought-provoking question. Certainly, education and access to education is a large part to do with it. And with that,I think our education system needs to be improved, if not overhauled. If we’re creating only a generation of consensus, without any questions, we’re doing something wrong.

@ Devin – I do hope you realize that by disagreeing you are making me quite angry, but are in fact, as well, engaging in the exact ideals I set forth in my post, which, well, makes me quite happy ;)

Anyway, I’ll use your example of the Causes and explain why it’s not enough. My own organization has a Community Service area, and in the past we have done a lot of good, but barely scratched the surface of what we could be doing, and the amount of change – and dare I say it? – revolution that could happen. So, I’m redeveloping the committee. We’re now going to focus on 2-3 issues a year, delve deep into them, get all sticky with it, and hopefully – surely- engage young people more.

In fundraising, the person that gives the money is great. The person that volunteers and then gives money is better. This is because they have more of an understanding than simply being influenced by “crowd clout.” The Causes application is good, but it is in danger of becoming what our consumer culture already is – disposable. If that makes sense… Like, fleeting passions for a pair of jeans or issue…

Rebecca

I’ve been causing conflict thru my responses to your posts since you started your blog, only to be chastised by you for my antagonism. I guess I was way ahead of the curve, and that you’ve now come to my way of thinking. As you say, “Conflict is good, fabulous even!”

Very nice post.

Rebecca,

Good post. Glad to see something here. It’s been too long.

I think there’s something else at play, as well: Fear of confrontation. Or maybe it’s just displacement of confrontation.

The social internet has given us a whole new avenue through which to tell people they’re wrong. We’ve all seen lengthy threads all over which seem to be nothing more than a competition to see who can say, “nuh-uh!” in the nastiest way.

Of course, that’s really easy on the web: there’s no real fear of repercussions. In real life, you have to look someone in the face when you tell them you think they’re wrong. They might get angry. They might get upset. They might even be devastated.

Not so on the internet. Sure, you’re more than certainly going to hear all sorts of nasty things about your ancestry, but at least you won’t have to deal with someone else’s emotions. It’s a lot easier that way.

Our generation spends its conflict energy in ways that don’t matter. Doing so, we lose our ability to handle conflict in the real world.

We’re not necessarily nodding our heads because we agree. We may just be nodding because it’s easier than speaking up.

This is a fantastic and wonderful piece of writing. You capture ideas of apathy and action and juxtapose them on the landscape of Gen Y.

But, such seemingly lackluster behavior is not limited to Gen Y, and so now I wonder, “What should we do about it?”

I’d love to see you offer some recommendations for how to overcome an attitude of pandering and mediocrity. Having opinions and sharing them is one thing – but how far can that get us? In other words, then what?

@ Johannes – I respect yours, and others, who leave differing opinions even if it makes me angry or upset. I think you learn more when people disagree with you, but I don’t always like it, nor do I have to end up agreeing with you all the time!

@ Eric – those are all insightful observations. I prefer people would disagree with me in person, because you can read them better and I feel, see what there true intentions are. It’s easier to misconstrue that in a comment, email or over the phone. But you’re right, people like to hide behind these things. I often find it’s easier for me to express what I want in writing… but I try very hard not to shy away from speaking up in real life. Thank you!

@ Sam – Thank you for your supportive comments. And for the interesting challenge. It’s interesting, when I write a post, it’s like another piece to the puzzle for me, and I’m not sure what the end picture will be like. So to answer “then what?” I don’t know. I mean, I know, but I don’t think there’s a magic key which is what I’m really searching for. Well, that wasn’t helpful whatsoever – I’ll mull over it some more.. :)

“Waiting for the world to change…” that seems to be our generation’s motto. Things are happening, almost because it is inevitable to happen — it’s supposed to happen — and not from sheer force of will. Change, however, always begin as a conversation and sharing our story and our beliefs is great start. what we are lacking, if i may say so, is our emotion.

Our emotions are what cause us to act. It is our behavioral response. If we are not angry or afraid or sad about something, if this passion of ours isn’t expressed with vim and vigor (and without looking like a crazy lunatic) then nothing will happen. We will be defined as the apathetic generation not because we don’t have the freedoms to do so but because we do have it and have nothing to show for.

Our generation has the intelligence, the know-how, the ability to do it. We have yet to harness our emotions to illicit action. JFK, RFK, and MLK all knew how to apply their emotions to urge action. Will our generation carry the torch?

Haha, don’t be a ’cause snob’. You may think your approaches are best and that’s great–do what you believe in. Me? I dedicate my resources (money, in this case) to a cause on Facebook (or my alma matter, or United Way) and when available, I give my time through Race for a Cure, Habitat for Humanity, etc. This is how I do it, that’s how you do it.

In the words of Tim Ferris, no matter what cause it is or how I participate in it, the value of my commitment is no greater or worse than other folks’. ;)

@ Manda – Great perspective. I think the idea of emotion that you bring up is precisely what is lacking when we scratch the surface of giving back. That’s needed in the beginning because you’re seeing what actually makes you get sweaty hands and all excited, but then you have to take the leap. Thank you for commenting!

@ Devin – I do all that too. It’s great that you do too. I don’t think our approaches are all that different. But if I’m a cause snob, I’m damn proud of it. I’ve worked in the nonprofit field for nearly eight years now, not counting work I did in high school. Everyone has their way of giving back, a system, that’s true. And it’s not for anyone to judge that yours is better than mine. But in this case, I’m not talking about an individual system, but how we should approach engagement on a widespread level.

It’s a very complex issue you bring up. It’s more than a distaste for controversy. We live in an hyped up, sensationalized world. The media landscape offers enough controversy, enough conflict, so we don’t have to do it ourselves.

Plus, we realize that conflict for the sake of conflict is an empty promise, so we choose to spend our time elsewhere, because the risks are too great for there to be no benefit on the other end.

All the time, we ignore the fact that the problem is really in finding something to fight for. Not for the sake of fighting, but because when you’re willing to fight for something, that means you have passion. Which means you know yourself enough to have confidence in your ability to choose a cause to be passionate about. But members of Gen Y don’t really know themselves yet. Do we? That’s why you can label us vanilla, and that doesn’t piss anyone off. Because we’ve chosen to value consensus over change, because it’s easier, it’s less work, and it’s less risky. Safety in numbers, right?

We don’t spend enough time looking for something to be passionate about, because that singles us out. It’s not a requirement to do this anymore; it’s a liability. So we write our checks to charitable organizations, we post causes on our Facebook walls, instead of investing the time to get dirty, to get out there, and to risk in investing the time into finding something worth fighting for.

Rebecca – This is a wonderful post…Not only is it well written, but incredibly amusing as well.

I see in you a trait that all millennial leaders would be wise to emulate: Positive Discontent. Positive discontent pushes a person to test their true capabilities and consistently improve upon or find better ways of doing things. It is the drive pushes people to live as close to their full potential as possible, and the way that many historical heroes made progress. Leonardo da Vinci once said, “I have offended mankind because my work didn’t reach the quality it should have.” – He understood positive discontent.

What is more, and I fully agree, you more accurately identify Gen-Yers as, not so much being conservative, but being complacent, which carries with it far more accountability.

[…] Modite, one of the many Wisconsin business bloggers (I have noticed a trend in business blogging– that many great business bloggers are from Wisconsin.  The state’s motto is “Forward.” Hmm…), is asking is Gen Y too quiet?  This is a question that I would love to discuss with other Millennials in person because I think that some of us feel we have to be quiet(er) when dealing with other generations.  When dealing with fellow Gen Y’ers, idea and dialouge is much more open and collaborative.  In fact, I don’t discriminate but I feel best about my work when I am dealing with people I relate too (Familiar=Comfort Zone which can be great for idea generation). […]

Where’s the rage? I think you’ve nailed it in a few of your other posts. It’s gone to bed. Gen Y is a group of rag tag soldiers. We’re exhausted and can’t make up our minds. The dizzying array of choices handed down to us from the freedom fighters that came before lead us to ask:

Do I fight for the polar bears, Iraq, women’s rights, fair labor wages, free trade?

Do we become famous and use that to leverage our platforms (Think Chuck Norris, Oprah, Kevin Bacon and recent elections)?

Do we get stinkin’ rich, create trust funds and foundations, also to leverage up for our kids and other societies who won’t reap the benefits until we are dead?

Do we climb the corporate ladder and set an example for other CEO’s in an attempt to change the corporate landscape?

We can do just about anything and it seems that we are having trouble deciding where to focus our efforts. We have so many choices that are pretty much within our reach if we are willing to work hard enough and sacrifice. Another problem is, we realize attaining our goals won’t make us happy. We find we are happy making a wage good enough to earn a yearly vacation and put organic food on the table, but beyond that, we want to get back to bed. This doesn’t lead to social change. You need to sacrifice.

I think our passions are still there, beneath the surface…but diffuse. We want to be all things to all issues and we can’t. Gen Y needs pick our pony and stick with it.

i needed to hear this! i’ve been treading lightly at my workplace regarding a project i KNOW is brilliant, feasible and financially viable. it occurred to me only yesterday that my ‘pandering’ to the higher-ups’ opinions of the project might be exactly why they don’t realize it’s a great idea!

believe it or not, the older generations want to see the glint in our eyes, the fire in our bellies. it makes them believe that we believe, and that’s what they want to see.

one more point – just start. if you have an idea, a belief, a cause, then go do it. don’t talk about it, don’t plan it, don’t have a meeting on it. start. and go forth with an UNSTOPPABLE ATTITUDE.

@ Tiffany – Complex indeed. And you bring up even more issues. The idea of media contributing to our silence is an interesting one. Certainly, it’s tiring to see everyone fighting in the media, and makes us just want to hibernate until it all blows over! Also, I think you hit on some important points with the idea of risk. As I quoted, we don’t like risk, but we are the most entrepreneurial generation. I think we just need to push off the edge sometimes so we can see where we land… ;) Thank you for a great comment.

@ James – Ooo, I love that term – positive discontent! I’ll put that in my personal ad. I enjoy being compared to Da Vinci as well, so all around I greatly appreciate your comment :) To have positive discontent, however, is really hard. I’ll be the first to admit that there are many days – too many days- that I wish I could just be a trophy wife and not have to worry about anything.. maybe it my next life!

@ Milena – Ah, you’ve picked up on another great theme of too many choices. I really believe that this is so true, and makes us only scratch the surface of opportunities as I was mentioning to Devin earlier. I sometimes wonder though, with the knowledge economy, if this is the way of the future. My guess is it’s not though as we’re already revolting in ways. Like, we enjoy hyper-local events, restaurants, products as a way to narrow down the choices consumer-wise. Thank you for being so insightful!

@ Holly – Go, girl, go! You’re right on that older generations want us to be a little risky. When I meet with CEOs and other important people for the first time, I’m pretty sure that my passion is what keeps them talking to me afterwards!

Yes, we have too many choices and life may be easier in many ways, but we also spend more time alone. Words are very powerful, but there’s nothing as contagious as another person’s enthusiasm face to face, which previous generations used to their advantage with their secret meetings and rallies and commune living, etc.

I also think that constantly consuming so much information can almost make you feel like you’ve been involved in something, because it does feel like a giant conversation going on around you. But it turns out that you’ve actually just been sitting there.

Mary – you are so right on about consuming and not actually doing anything. I attempted a “Reading Deprivation” exercise once. It got me nowhere fast. Being left alone with my thoughts was a dismal experience. I think if I was in the right frame of mind, I could have continued with it and gotten to a point where I took action on my own behalf. You know, epiphanies and stuff. I do think we consume too much, avoiding the very issues we’d love to change, but not be the first one to step up to the plate. Ouch.

What makes a greatness, from the Dalai Lama to a great barista, is commitment.

Commit to something. It’s ok to make a mistake. Quit and commit to something else. (And everyone invokes Seth Godin so often that it feels cliche. But *The Dip* is excellent advice on when to quit.) You’ll make a difference, and you’ll know yourself better as a result.

Commit to learning. Management great Peter Drucker was a great autodidact; he was a sequential committer. He would spend a 3 year period studying different areas of expertise (presumably in his “off hours”!). To paraphrase Drucker, 3 years wasn’t long enough to master a subject, but it was long enough to understand it. He did this for 60 years! (And you can find the interview where he describes this process on the Inc. magazine archive.)

And finally, the most important thing for America (and all of the people we affect) *needs* to be done by a team, but can’t be done without commitment.

So commit to voting. Pick one — one issue, one candidate — for this election. Yeah, I’m embarrassed by some of the choices I made in my 20s. But it beats the alternative; being embarrassed by the people who run our country, and feeling like I stood by and let it happen.

Your commitment will be enough.

Be well!

Thanks for including one of my ideas in such a well-written post. When the article (by Friedman) you refer to orginally came out I thought it was ridiculous, but this post has challenged the way I see our generation.

I also noticed that I don’t comment on posts very often. I usually have something to say, but would rather not disturb the peace or offend the person with the blog. So perhaps that’s something I need to work on – just commenting a little more.

Great post!

Is facebook a revolution?

Or $0.99 (or free) music downloads?

Both were started and fully-embraced by gen-y. I think the difference between a lot of gen-y changes and those from past generations are that there aren’t extreme generational segregations. Gen-Yers want the other generations to follow them to informational freedom and are succeeding in doing it.

I think part of it comes from the desire for everyone to like you and be your friend. You can’t and wont like anyone. We all know you still need to respect that person, but ultimately get that confused with liking them. Some of our parents tried to be our friends, but I think those of us who had the opposite, really respect them now for how they raised us. The truest friendships will survive inconvenient honesty, and this is something that will transfer over to the business sector as well.

@ Milena – No problem – you have great links :)

@ Anne – Definitely – I like the idea of commitment, but certainly difficult for a twenty-something to do seeing as everything tells us not to commit? I wonder if this is a natural life-cycle and we’ll just commit when we’re older. Whereas conflict can certainly be encouraged and implemented much earlier as the first step..

@ Monica – I’m happy that I’ve made you think differently, and honored to have quoted you in the post!

@ Mike – Really interesting viewpoint, and I think the first valid argument against what I’m saying in the way that you’ve framed it… I’ll have to mull over that some more. Thank you for commenting!

@ Steve – You’re speaking my language – I do want to be liked by everyone, but I also think that many people like you because you disagree, as long as in a respectful manner. I.e., like in your parenting example. And the term “inconvenient honesty” is just lovely!

I think Mike B up there has a good point. Yes, we are the information (entertainment) freedom age. We might not be hippies crowding the downtown core (some of us might be) to stop any war here or there – but we do it by breaking down information barriers.

We might have been the most offended when GW lied out his anus about weapons here or there. We knew it all along, and it was the lies and effect that hurt all along.

And, QUESTION: why does the Iraq war only ‘suck’ ? Saying it ‘sucks’ implies to me that you think it’s necessary, but it ‘sucks’, and I would not agree. I think war is outdated and brutally dishonest.

[…] Sierra just linked me to an incredible blog post about my generation, “Generation Y”.  I think it’d be a good idea to read it if you’re around the same age as me (22).  It’s one of those posts that inspires me so much that I can barely stay in my seat.  It makes me want to hop on my bike and ride as fast as possible for a really long time.  Go read it. […]

Rebecca, this is why I love your blog.- I declare this your Jerry Maguire’s mission statement!

Anyone that thinks Gen Y is quite really missed the boat….or should I say BLOG. As far as I can see, Gen Y has a very strong voice, it is just come out in the form of keystrokes. Your voice is clear, articulate and doesn’t need to scream and that is powerful. If people think your quite, maybe they just need to listen more closely.

Love and hugs,
Your very loud Gen X sister…:) Recruitnik

Hi, Rebecca.

I feel like I know you. I transcribed your interview with Andrew Rondeau a few hours ago. After I transcribed it I wrote down your address and thought I would check it out.

Great Interview and neat blog. You kind of inspire me to try it. Don’t know if I would have enough to say.

Linde

I have a few thoughts on this post, and whereas I usually keep my thoughts to myself (like Monica, so as not to rock the boat), she has inspired me to step of my comfort zone to respond – thanks Monica!

We are the first generation to be raised in a child-focused and politically-correct society. In grade school, if you gave a valentine to one person, you had to give one to the whole class. No one could be left out or ridiculed. We were raised to treat everyone, at least on the surface, with respect, accepting differences of race, gender, disability, etc. Of course, we each have our own conscious and unconscious biases, but in general, we’ve been instructed since childhood not to be provocative in a way that offends others. Maybe that has something to do with our silence. One poster also correctly pointed out that many controversial issues today don’t affect us personally – for example, the war in Iraq. I’ve gotten the impression reading this blog and its comments that it doesn’t draw much of a Gen Y military audience. This brings me to my next point, and in the spirit of this post, I am encouraged to express my opinion.

I take issue with the statement “the war in Iraq sucks.” The use of the word ‘sucks’ minimizes so many of the sacrifices that so many of our generation have already made. I volunteer at a military hospital, and I am continuously amazed at the dedication, courage and humor severely injured soldiers display given their horrible situations. Scraping ice off my car this morning sucked. When I go home after work today and spend Friday night writing a grad school paper, that will suck. Having your legs blown off when you are 23 because you volunteered to serve an incompetent commander-in-chief and short-sighted public so much more than sucks. Your statement fails to take into account so much of the human impact of this war. I know this is minor point to belabor, but it really struck a nerve.

Fantastic post!

@ thrive – Good points. See my response to Sally for the “sucks” part.

@ Recruitnik – thanks! I hope that Gen Y is making change through the “information” exchange, as Mike put it, to make change, but I feel that this is only part of it. Only time will tell! My real sister is Gen X, btw, so I’m happy to have an online version ;)

@ Linde – Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I can’t wait to hear the interview! I started a blog after I started commenting a lot on Employee Evolution and Brazen Careerist a lot. I thought, heck, if I’m spending so much time writing comments, I might as well write a blog! The rest, as they say, is history. If you have the smallest inkling of wanting to try it, I would go for it. You can be as public with it as you want… Good luck and let me know the address if you do!

@ Sally – You’re absolutely right that our upbringing has a ton to do with how we’re reacting now. I just don’t think that that’s a good excuse necessarily. There’s a difference between being a jerk, and expressing your opinion respectfully.

As for the phrase, “the Iraq war sucks,” I agree one hundred percent, but I’m curious what phrase would encompass all the suffering? Sometimes words don’t do enough to adequately express what we want them too. I will say, my post was twice as long as this, and I cut a lot. A lot. A lot. Also, I will say that to me, the phrase “the Iraq war sucks” does express a certain resignation and helplessness to me that perhaps isn’t in tune with the rest of the post, as I want people to feel inspired to act. But I think we all do feel that way – it’s a horrible affair, but we’re at a loss of what to do. I don’t know. It’s a complicated topic. I greatly appreciate you weighing in with your closer-hand experience. You bring a viewpoint that needs to be heard more often.

Rebecca, you’re right in the way you answer to Sally. There is definitely a certain hopelessness to the situation abroad. The best we are allowed (as spectators) to do is simply speak out against it when we have the chance. THAT is what sucks, while the war more than sucks.

As much as we’d even like to blame ‘ol GW, he’s just a scapegoat. It’s a much larger story that for sure, requires up to 1,200 blogs to cover.

There is a difference between being quiet and conservative and learning the ropes to know what is important.

A log of the other generations had specific causes to strike out against — and you list many of them and thanks to all those that worked those issues to get them better (not fixed).

Gen Y may have consensus, but I don’t think you have found the cause that would make you walk the streets in protest.

Yet, there is an important cause you are working: having meaning in work. One can’t take over a corporation, one can’t force managers to provide meaning, yet, Gen Y clearly wants to work on their terms. Quite frankly, so do the rest of us.

There is work being done, in spite of having consensus and being unwilling to do the extra marches for peace in our time.

But those things are strengths — consensus in meaningful work and working the system inside the system are powerful tools for change.

As I always say…one miracle at a time.

Rebecca,
If you look at a lot of the information regarding our generation, you will see that we are very different from the previous one. We tend to move back home after college, for one. Also, we seem to be very unsure about our futures, and a lot of us are amidst our “quarter-life crisis.”

My point is, that I believe our generation is maturing at a slower rate. But maturing, we are. Once we reach a certain point in our lives and in our careers, we will possess more certainty about our opinions. Right now, most of us are still trying decide what they are.

Additionally, I think that when we do take the stance we are bound for, it will be an entirely unique and progressive one. One that is more precise and well founded than previous ones.

Oh Rebecca, I do like your writing. “Petered out like a mandatory orgasm” – you should be writing novels!

Gen Y needs to simply grab ahold of something and take massive action. What better opportunity to affect change than a presidential election year!!

Get together and make lots of noise. Make your voices heard. This is your time. Force change.

I’m trying to get an understanding of who this Generation Y is? Who are these 20-some year olds who “don’t have opinions”? Where are these “Orwellian armies” with this peculiar notion of a consensus? For god’s sake, what imbeciles actually take facebook Causes at all seriously?
I’m 20-something. I have opinions – very strong one’s, in fact – that I argue over – with my peers. Often.

And which generation, exactly, are you comparing us to?
Perhaps, the ‘Silent’ Generation – in their grey flannel suits and ticky-tacky houses. Of course there was our parents’ generation, that rebelled against conformity because it was cool, and woke up from their acid trip just on time to pull out of Vietnam – about 10 years to late.

If we appear content, maybe it’s because, to an extent we should. After all, our generation has no great depression, no Nazis infiltrating Harvard, or Communists on the brink of world domination. We might be more uniform because we have less (or less pressing) issues to differ on.
Or maybe, we just don’t believe (yes, I used a dirty word) that cutting class to go to some protest that won’t really change anything (virtual politics) is an efficient way of fostering change. Besides, can the generations that elected, and then re-elected Presi-retard Bush really comprehend our generation’s political state of mind?

But the issues exist, and our generation does care about them – although maybe some people just blog about those who don’t care.
I care about the health care system, and gun control. I care about laws that infringe on my freedom. And yes, I also care about the war in Iraq, and treating people equally. I care about global warming, too. But I think it’s more productive to facilitate efficient transportation methods, for example, rather than get blazed and stand naked on a Glacier (in protest).

Perhaps I’m the sheltered one in the group, but I’d suggest to at least reflect on whether your window to the world is a universal as you imply, or if you should find an alternative for the neighborhood sports bar to continue your search for the next Martin Luther King Jr.

Rebecca – that term is great! It comes from a fantastic book titled UpGrade!

A trophy wife does not suit you. Your personality drives your desire to improve, and no matter what you choose in life you will always look for better ways of doing something. That is what positive discontent does, it means you are always striving to push your capabilities, others capabilities, and improve.

Okay, I’m going to break all the rules here. First I’m going to agree and be nice. Then I’m going to be 50 and say just about the whole world is how you’ve described the 20 year olds…hanging back, assessing, assuring agreement, circle the wagons, pandering, etc.

You my dear (she said, like the old fart she is), are of the leader variety; impatient, full of vision, self expressed. And the world needs you. Not your opinions, your inspiration. I don’t think it’s about the generation, it’s about the humanness of it all. That’s what you’re breaking from, and at first it’s kind of annoying to see that you’re mostly doing it by yourself (lotsa leaders in this bloggy world…)

And this leads to the disagreeing part, to the belief that belief is irrelevant. I don’t need to believe in TREE for a TREE to be real. BELIEF does not equal TRUE any more than opinion equals reality.

What I (hope) I’m saying here is that leadership and passion and commitment are what change the world, any age, any generation. Not belief. Belief panders after agreement and being liked, and circling the wagons. Commitment bypasses all of it and leads to the inspiration of audacity and irreverence and profoundly moving moments of grace and reconciliation and peace and … whatever you’re moved to change in this world.

2 cents.

@ thrive – I’m with ya!

@ Scot – Interesting thoughts. I think that to the contrary we have had many issues to rally against including those I list in the post – global warming, Iraq, etc. I think we’re making change , just not enough…

@ Todd – Ah, yes, these are many of the reasons that I’m frustrated. For us to be maturing at a slower rate is actually quite dangerous since soon we’ll be having families and the opportunity to “light a fire” will not be as easy. And as I mentioned to Scot, we’ve had many issues around which to rally – were none of those good enough?

@ Daniel – We have made quite an impact on the election so far, haven’t we? And this post was many many times long than what you see here.. it could have been the beginning of a book maybe ;)

@ Amit – I appreciate your thoughtful response. In a sense, we can be content comparatively, but not really. Do you really think that the Iraq situation is not so devastatingly horrible, as Sally and thrive describe above, that we should just be content? To take just one issue facing our world today. And there are people who believe that Facebook causes are enough. Devin says as much above.

It’s interesting – you state, for example, that you encourage efficient transportation rather than some form of protest. My arguement is that we need both. I, myself, don’t own a car and use communitycar.com when I need to get around without my own two feet or mass transit. But not talking about these issues and not making my values and passion known about why I’m doing this , well then, how will others follow? What’s great about our generation is that we are strongly influenced by our peers instead of the media or government. But we can’t change things without hearing what’s going on.

@ James – So you condemn me to a life of positive discontent permanently then, eh? That’s too bad. I met a lot of great looking men this weekend…. ;) Kidding! I’ll have to look up that book.

@ Lisa – “The humanness of it all…” – you’re right. That does appeal to me. And certainly I don’t “believe” that belief is irrelevant nor that it equals reality. Belief is the acceptance of something as truth, whether or not that is true or not. Thanks for getting me back to basics and for your great comment!

Ha – it is not a life of condemation… Positive Discontent is obviously a wonderful gift – no matter what situation you find yourself in. Even if one of those ‘Great looking men’ pan out to make you a great husband. :) (BTW – when you check out UpGrade! you should check out my book, Developing a Million-Dollar Relationship. It may help you catch one of those men…)

You have great things ahead of you Rebecca. Keep striving for more…

[Do you really think that the Iraq situation is not so devastatingly horrible]
Well, I happen to think that Vietnam was worse and happened for less justifiable reasons, but, yes I agree, Iraq is an issue. It’s not as pertinent to our generation because we’re not being drafted. My point here is not that our generation is filled of MLK’s, that we will solve all issue. My point is that we’re not that different from previous generations.

[And there are people who believe that Facebook causes are enough. Devin says as much above.]
Yes, unfortunately there are. They are the same people who think gathering a thousand signatures will stop oil companies from polluting, or that the evangelists outside campus, by handing me a bible and saying hello, might actually make me forget that I don’t even believe in god. These delusional idealists existed before. And if our generation happens to be joining Causes more than signing petitions – well – that just because it’s easier, and doesn’t really hurt.

[not talking about these issues and not making my values and passion known about why I’m doing this , well then, how will others follow?]
I don’t disagree there, and I’m not suggesting that protest is completely useless, let alone philosophical/political debate – which is one of my favorite activities. I merely saying that perhaps we’re just evolving. Putting a larger emphasis on what is more useful, rather than picketing on the streets and staging walk-outs for everything.
I’d argue, for example, that the engineer(s) who are developing hybrid engines are probably doing more for the environment than the all of the protest in America. I plan on leading a life where I utilize my talents (which are not, thankfully, limited to holding up a sign and chanting in unison) to change the world. I believe Gen Y agrees with me, or at least I hope so (I know – screw hope).

I am late to this, but it was such a good post!

Born in 1978, I am by some accounts Gen Y, by some account Gen X, and by some accounts in a “cusp status.” My typical social circle ranges from about 25-35. I preface with this because my circle is more varied than just Gen Y, but I did want to comment on something I find troubling.

I notice, first, that it is considered rude to discuss politics or policy in any form in social settings. And if you choose to go there, the conversation is less than enlightening (and usually unnecessarily abrasive). It is unfortunate that the very things we need to discuss are things that completely shut down conversations.

Friedman’s article says Gen Y should be asking candidates about three things: climate change, Social Security, and the deficit “so we won’t all be working for China in 20 years.” When I mention the deficit and China’s role in our debt, people act as though it is conspiracy theory. Guess what–statements backed up by facts, despite what the media might tell you, are not conspiracy theories.

I worry that, perhaps due to info overload, the Gen Y and cuspers are a little too quick to hear and parrot talking points. It is time to use the unprecedented access we have to information and to each other for something other than poking. Almost none of my facebook friends post articles (except for the occasional, apolitical humorous piece). What a waste of a way to let people know where you are coming from (and to learn about them through their responses).

Post articles, bring up touchy subjects, offend people. They’re big kids–they can hold their own. And if they can’t, their belief system is scarily shallow. If you never push the envelope, you’re probably being less than true to yourself.

Sorry–a bit long winded, but this has really been on my mind as election season has progressed. Keep on bringing up timely subjects!

[…] For those who are wondering, I have two reasons for trying it this way.  The first is I have a full time job and don’t have time to moderate a comments section that could get messy or ugly.  The second is I think millennials should be able to discuss these types of questions online, as long as the discussions are tasteful and constructive.  We already censor our political views at work, social events, and even with our apathetic friends – we need an outlet.  Blogging should be our outlet, so let’s develop a community by sharing our thoughts on questions that matter to us. […]

Loving this topic.

I don’t think the secret to waking Gen-Y up is about conflict. There’s conflict around us all the time – political, economic, geographical, religious, community, professional, even familial – so while conflict is one way of engaging people it tends to be more tactical and reactive than strategic and pro-active.

Gen Y is like a good vinaigrette. It has many ingredients that are brought together and homogenised, turning those individual ingredients into something that’s more palatable and that goes better with the dish being served. Gen Y has all the ingredients but has become homogenised – a more ‘conservative’ version of what the ingredients are really about.

I think this come from 3 places –

Firstly, Gen Y are all about consensus and respect. Somehow this has turned into being overly careful to listen to every position and factoring in all the ‘beliefs’ and ‘opinions’ before making decisions. Naturally this will lead to a dilution of the original ideas and motivations.

Secondly, a lot of Gen Y are afraid of screwing up. They’re used to being high-achievers, accomplishing a lot and delivering consistently highly – but the risks are all carefully measured to ensure a good level of confidence in the outcome before starting. Where the risks are too high they’ll put things off or put it out to consensus, which takes us right back to vinaigrette.

Thirdly, and I think this is probably the big one, what’s missing in Gen Y is people doing things that mean something to them. It’s all to easy to abstract beliefs and opinions from the individual these days, and that leads to a separation – however thin – between the person and the engagement. When you’re engaging with something for reasons other than it means something and matters to you, you might end up with a pretty decent vinaigrette but your loose of massive amount of potential and growth.

It’s true confidence that’s missing – the confidence to lead without constantly looking for consensus and thinking about respect. The confidence to get out there and forget about screwing up or looking silly (God knows I’ve done enough of that myself!), and the confidence to engage with things that mean something. I sometimes call it inspired participation – participating fully in your life and allowing yourself to be inspired by what’s important, relevant and matters.

Generation Y is the most pampered and coddled generation in recent history. Try explaining to your grandfather that you turned a job down because you were holding out for a gig that paid over $50, 000 and provided better stock options. Why would give these people a reason protest–a widespread decrease in internet speed? MTV cancels The Hills?

Generation Y, AKA Millennials, have never experienced anything on par with WWII, Vietnam, or the civil rights movement. Of course their conservative; not only have they been able to ignore the plight of those less fortunate, they’ve been encouraged to do so by either their parents, their friends, or Bill O’Reilly.

We are engaged in two foreign wars at the moment that has claimed over 5000 American lives. Yet, this isn’t the top news story. What is? The economy! I’m as concerned about my portfolio as anybody, but I think I’d forfeit every bit of prosperity if it would take one person out of harms way. Then again, I was born in the seventies.

[…] Millennials aren’t revolting in the streets or marching on Washington, as Thomas Friedman suggests we should. We know that doesn’t actually accomplish anything by itself. What Millennials are really all about is improving broken systems and unifying unnecessary divisions. The best way to do that is by working within the system and doing, not by dropping out and making a lot of noise. […]

I wrote this for another forum a couple weeks ago but I believe it should still fit nice.

“I think today has become a perfect storm of shit that fell into place. For one, technology has made life too convenient. Two, the media and mega conglomerates have spoon fed us daily dose mix of pills, mindless infotainment/entertainment and worst has found a formula to exploit individualism as something to sell, which in turn makes it lose credibility. Three, a younger generation who’s needy, selfish, and basically spoiled from promises of a life that should’ve had flying cars and grandiose dreams. Four, government policies have shifted the money to the elite while (not even secretly) expanding government and creating a false sense of quality of life for the rest of us. A good example is the housing bubble.

It’s nice to have information at the tips of our fingers but is it necessary? Personally I could do without Ipods, email, ect. but most people now can’t. It’s a mentally addicting drug. I’m not saying to go back to the stone age, no matter how appealing, but as stated before we need to take more personal responsibility for our surroundings and ourselves. From fixing global warming to woopin your kids ass from time to time.

Capitalism will always be capitalism there’s no way around that but what surprises me is that no one realizes this, the market thrives on ideas no matter what, if that idea happens to be saying I need a bigger dick then it’s gonna respond by saying try Viagra for so much money.( idk how much it is cuz I don’t buy it but anyway). Another great example of capitalism exploiting individualism is the T.V show ‘Made’ on Mtv. Which shows how a teen, maybe like you the viewer, can be made into another more “cool” you. Not only does that demean the viewers intelligence, confidence, and self-worth but at the same time generate revenue for Mtv. It’s basic psychology, if your parents know about it, it’s uncool and if Mtv knows about how unique you are( or want to be) then thats when it loses it’s meaning and becomes really uncool. 1 word describes this best “nigga”. I leave that one to you.

Next is the mindset of a Gen Yer, Millennial, whatever you wanna call us. this is a generation that grew up with a sense of entitlement that was brought on by the 80’s over indulgence and a sense of missed opportunity of the past century, similar to the 70’s jones generation toward the 60’s. I once heard Ray Manzarek from the doors saying something about the atmosphere in the 60’s as ” this sense of we reached the end of the world without starting over, across the water was Asia, Vietnam and other cultures yet learned” I wish I could remember more of that radio interview but can’t. The main point here is that we have the spirit of the 60’s, the economic problems of the 70’s and the cynicism of the 90’s Gen Xers.

Which brings me to the next problem the collaboration and unofficial merger of the democratic and republican ideals. I think a great quote would be ” It’s bad when parties don’t agree but it’s worst when they do.”. Think about that for a sec. really, this administration has more influence in executive spending and power not since F.D.R . Yet the core of the republicans is smaller gov. not bigger. I just read recently that inflation is around 6.5%, which it hasn’t been in almost 30 years. What does that mean? It means were pumping out new money like it’s fucking PEZ which then shrinks the value of the currency and projects a false state of economic growth. Where does the change from all this go? Open up the newspaper of the business section for the fortune 500 companies, find out who’s running them and there you have it. The Biggest problem about this is Americans are spending more than they can afford which eventually catches up and when that happens the economy will collapse under it’s own debt.”

This is what we have to face, would you wanna think about this or go do something meaningless?

generation y is indeed to quiet
as one of them i’d liek to point out that it is strongly affected by the change in musical styles and the overwhelming influence of the boomers
The boomers still beleive they’re in control and are passing lawas like our generation doesn’t even exist
BOOMERS CONTROL the politics and gen x contols the media,,, sio what do we have????

Don’t worry, your time is coming as you get stuck with a bankrupt nation and a non-functioning economy, none of which is your doing.

My generation (immediately post baby boom) is the first in US history where on average, parents enjoy a higher standard of living than their children. You may well continue this trend.

I think your analysis is good but in order to fully explain the phenomenon of why Gen Y behaves the way it does, you need to explain the causes of this behavior. It is anectdodally reasonable to say that Gen Y are “team players”, particularly in the way your characterize how that is manifested. Part of the reasoning behind that relates to the level of super involvement the generation experienced as children. I personally grew up with parents that were not as involved so I am intrinsically more independent than many people of my generation. The 1980’s and 1990’s experienced the first waves of a children centric culture. Parents began spending enormous amounts of time and money running their children from one supervised activity to the next. Think about the 1970’s when for the most part, children were loitering and spending alot of time in unsupervised activities. Contrast that to the 1980’s and 1990’s and you will see how society and the growing up process changed for our generation. Generation Y was prepared for achievement. Out of the achievement ethos flows the idea that one needs to follow the rules, create consensus, and live a balanced life. This generation is risk averse. Perhaps it’s because they have seen historic rates of divorce, financial meltdowns, and a relativistic culture in peril. Perhaps its because they better understand the systemic interconnectedness of a globalized world. Conservatism after all say’s that ideas have consequence. Generation Y has developed a sense of empathy because of how it has been exposed to the developing world. Pluralism and tolerance are considered the new upwardly moble ethos because they jive with a team work frame of mind and also keep the peace.

Some members of this generation, such as myself, are more independent and are comfortable making opinions (as long as they are backed up). For the integrity of the analysis, it is important not to generalize when characterizing any generation. The purpose of this forumn could be to point out the systemic realities present within this generation so that with this information, our generation….improve. That is what we do. We are habitual improvers. We believe that the future will be better than the past, we believe that we will have more education, more opportunities, and more potential to help the world than previous generations. Sure, our optimism is born out of a state of abundance and relative peace, but that was the whole point of globalism. A world that is increasingly interconnected has the potential to work out problems together, to create consensus, to clearly define initiatives, and to relate to eachothers diverse ethnic and religious backgrounds with a pluralistic tolerance. I think our generation, more than any other in history, has the capacity to forge strong international relationships and leaving a powerful mark on history.

Being in Gen X, I dont think that Gen Y is really any different from any other generation as far as having opinions, beliefs, passions, etc. Those things are inherent in life, regardless of the age of birth.

But what Gen Y is missing, at least in the Western world, is the ability to communicate with people, face to face – to express those opinions in the streets not just the blog; to ask someone out by actually talking to their face, not texting their phone; to express dissatisfaction with a top-down boss in their office, not tweeting it secretly back at your desk.

We’re raising future generations that are great at sending messages, but inept at communicating.

I have to say, based on my experiences, I agree with your article.

I’m Gen X, and many of the discussions I have with Gen Yers fall right into your belief vs. opinion statement. I had a discussion recently with two intelligent Gen Y professionals. The discussion centered around the environment and the impact of large corporate big box stores (e.g. Wal-Mart). I was proposing that there were potential environmental benefits from these types of stores, as well as economic ones. The conversation quickly declined, and rather than have a discussion about the issues, I was dismissed as being a mouth-breathing meat eater.

This is surely not indicative of a whole generation, but there does seem to be a large number of people who embrace concepts like the Iraq war “sucks’, and global warming is a problem, without ever even trying to dig deeper and investigating the political, economic and social motivations behind the government and corporate actions.

[…] For some of us with more than a few gray hairs, insights into younger people can be extremely useful, both in navigating life and in our marketing and business activities. Rebecca Thorman, writing in the blog modite.com, shares insights in her post, “Generation Y is too quiet, too conservative.” Source of her insight? She is one. Excerpt: “Generation Y is so overly focused on the yin of consensus that we’ve lost its yang of conflict.” Read story. […]

[…] Generation Y is too quiet, too conservative: Do we fight enough or do we just agree to avoid conflict? Doesn’t disagreeing with someone really just show you respect them enough to challenge them? I think so. How about you? […]

generation y is worst generation ever sadly i am part of this gen the baby boomers and generation x was the best both had good music ( rolling stones jimi hendrix the doors eric clapton , 80s/90s thrash metal death metal the baby boomers changed the world like fighting for civil rights in the south protesting vietnam womans rights movement and woodstock generation x changed the world as well like the fall of the berlin wall and the end of the cold war gen x also questioned stuff like government religion race issues ( rodney king and oj simpson ) . the only good thing about gen y is the internet got better

You’re absolutely right?! And I agree! But what do we do? The dept crisis is something Generation Y will pay for… how do I fight that? How do I fight for retirement and social security? How do I fight for democracy? I am ready to protest; I need a reason and facts to back it up… I can supply the passion and the manpower. But seriously, what do we do?!

We live on a planet that could blow itself apart, in a solar system whose sun will eventually go out, in a universe that may shred itself apart. Nothing we do, say, or think will ever matter when it’s all said and done.

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